Will It Ever

I'm just so sad. I can't even cry enough. I am just feeling so sad tonight, this morning, right now. My chest aches from trying to be strong and trying to not hurt. The happy face facade is crumbling and falling into my hands...pathways down my face. Will my broken self be mended? Will my broken self, ache

for eternity? Broken heart, soul, mind, and fist? For now? For ever? Why me, why you, why now, why ever...I can't explain the tear soaked pillow or the taste of blood in my mouth. The winding of my spirit so tight that it will snap and recoil, maybe break another innocent bystander. Why the tears? Sweet girl? Why the sad face? You're too pretty to be sad. Well sad doesn't give a Fuck about how pretty you are. And neither does ignoring and lonliness. They're all close friends. Kismet lovers who are freakishly into threesomes. The sluts. Drive me far away from this insanity, man made lunacy. Please change the channel? We pay for cable we should get to watch whatever the hell we want to...why the fuck won't it work??! Fuck...technology. just like relationships. One minute you get what you want, the next you have to call the cable guy to come held fix your problem.. Time to call the cable guy? Is it yet? Go to sleep, forget it all till the storm passes over and the shit storm is through.